In the Willows...

In the Willows...

Sunday, December 21, 2014

The in betweens

The in between is what I feel like these days.  Those moments between what is really going on around us.  What we participate in but don't really feel it, it's just the motion of living.

I find that words are hard for people, they never know what to say and I tell them that it's OK, when I am in their shoes, I don't know what to say.  Then there are the people that use too many words, careless words that never should feel the air underneath them.   In those moments I know how family/friend feud's start.  But I choose to understand, in these moments people are, sorry, they feel guilty, they have regrets, they are acting on grief, sometimes its grief that has nothing to do with what's at hand, sometimes it's left over from another time, place or even another loved one.

See my brothers and I grew up in a mental wasteland caused by miss placed words in grief.  Our parents come from large families, each of them ripped apart by careless words and selfish actions that no one chose to understand or ignore.  My parents families used their grief as an excuse to bring to life childhood/adult slights and misconceptions as weapons and excuses for greed and not playing fair.  I forgive them, because I miss knowing them and my cousins, not the "things" that it was about.

 Knowing this my brothers and I are careful with our words and actions, because we know that more important than any bauble is that we are brothers and sisters, we are family, our children deserve to have a future not damaged by our words.

Friday, December 19, 2014

Where have you been?

Timmy 2 starts carrying on exactly at 5:35 pm if no one has gotten to the barn by 5:30 to bring him his warm water and to refill his feed bucket.  I know my father is babying this cute adorable faced fuzz ball by giving him warm water, now that he is off his milk re-placer, but he is such a love and enjoys nothing more than a well placed scratch under the chin or on his back.

Holiday gift baskets are done and on their way...

I have gotten a few more sewing projects done for gifts, but most of my time has honestly been in the kitchen baking.  But now its time to move on to other things.

I spent the first few days of the week at my parents helping dad go through a few things and making calls, closing accounts due to mom's passing. My father, brothers and I spent a few hours going through photo's of general things and my mom's stained-glass work.  I knew she had done and sold a lot, but we were still surprised at the volume.  Then there were the paintings/murals that she had done, mostly custom orders.  For a short life, she left her mark in a lot of places and homes.

I knew the day would be coming, she had already lived a year more than her doctor had given her 4 years ago, but I still was not ready.  I am lucky, she wasn't just my mom, she was my friend and we shared so many things all of them gifts.

Thursday, December 18, 2014

grief and sadness

is abound.

On Friday afternoon 12/12, we lost mamma.

I know there will be sunny spots on the horizon, but I haven't walked far enough down the road to see that crest yet.

Wednesday, December 10, 2014


Elves are all around the house..

Monday, December 8, 2014

still working on

My Sheep Virtue blocks in Cross stitch.  I have not been sitting very much lately to be able to pick up my stitching.  But I did get to start block 6 this weekend.

On Thursday evenings I have started a sewing circle with a friend and we have been working on crazy quilt blocks.  I feel like I haven't got much accomplished on this but there are many hours of stitching into it so far.

Still making gingerbread... We have baked 6 batches and have only cut out 3 1/2 houses.  Yikes.
So yesterday afternoon, I hauled it all out again and made 6 more batches of gingerbread dough.  I have to get it all cut out and baked in the next two nights, because then I have to get the suckers together.  Much bigger houses this year, each roof has 8 pieces.  According to my mother I may have bitten off more than I can chew, but when don't I.  Its all about the kids and lord knows I love my munchkins.

So far I have used 25#'s of flour, 6 #'s of sugar, almost a gallon of molasses, 6#'s of shortening, 2 dozen eggs and a bunch of ginger, cinnamon and cloves. 

wish me luck, I may need it this year.

Friday, December 5, 2014

Simple joy's

are easy to come by, but sometimes over looked.

 I was exhausted by my day at the office and sighed at the thought of getting out everything and baking the night away.  I put it off for a little while as I puttered with more of my holiday decorating, then I headed for the kitchen.

As I started cream my ingredients, I suddenly felt a smile on my face and thoughts of my grandmothers made me nostalgic. As I was pressing my cookies and deciding how I was going to decorate them and add little bits of this and that, I found a that I was truly enjoying myself.

Thursday, December 4, 2014

frozen chicken water stinks, so....

I came across this photo on Pintrest and showed it to Joel.

He immediately listed off what we had on hand to accomplish this project.
Cinderblock - check
left over floor tile for top - check
explosion proof light fixture - check
(You have to know Joel, a regular fixture just won't due, when you have an explosion proof one left over from a job)
Metal chicken waterier - check
40 watt bulb (to start with) - check

All this ='s  no frozen water in the chicken coop so far.  And a very happy me that doesn't have to mess with ice every morning and evening.

Cinder block heater & water warmer - light bulb inside cinder bock covered with a stepping stone & water container set on top won't freeze......very clever idea!